Because
science (esp.
polar bear class) is bullshit, we're going to mix things up and help out the community by talking, not about
science, but about
sweet and
radical games you can play in your own
college cafeterias.
Find the Hot Girl (for 2-17 players)
Depending on your college campus, this game could prove incredibly challenging.
What you need:
- Eyes
- A good seat for creeping
- A hot girl
Instructions: Gather your friends and sit around a table in your cafeteria. Without being too obvious (it's a good idea to have food and drinks to at least look as though you should be there), look for a hot girl. When you've found one, point her out. You only win if everyone agrees she's hot.
I Spy a Creeper (for 2-infinite players)
Depending on your college campus, this game could be far too easy.
What you need:
- Eyes
- A well-developed sense of social acceptability
- Creepers
Instructions: As above, except that you're looking for the most creepy/ugly/disgusting/terrifying/unhygienic diners you can find. Also, no one wins. If you really need a winner, assign points to certain habitual creepers. The first to find them gets the points.
HINT: NEVER use the creepers' real names. Instead, assign them nicknames. Some examples include: Fox Hat Girl, Weasel Chin, Goatbeard, Baby Clown Girl, Freakishly Tall Kid, Ugly Jesus, etc.
What Is It? (for 2-infinite players)
Sometimes there are people whose gender is ambiguous. This game attempts to solve such ambiguities.
What you need:
- Eyes
- An "it"
- An inappropriate level of boldness (this game often requires it)
Instructions: Carefully watch as diners move about the cafeteria. If you spot a person whose gender appears questionable, announce "BOY OR GIRL?!?!" Your table then commences to speculate on the gender of the person in question. You win if you can definitively prove whether "it" is a boy or a girl.
HINT: Interaction IS allowed. However, you cannot actually ask the person their gender. This is considered a serious breach of the rules and will result in immediate disqualification.
Couple Creepin' (for 2-however many players can handle it)
Sometimes, people think that a college cafeteria is an appropriate place to touch each other. Usually, these people are incredibly unattractive.
What you need:
- Eyes
- Fucking creepy couples
- A strong constitution
Instructions: Identify and point out for your friends/tablemates gross couples engaging in highly inappropriate physical activities (some of these activities include: holding hands while eating, nuzzling, putting scarves on one another, sitting on each other's laps, prolonged goodbyes involving more kissing than anyone ever wanted to see while eating shitty cafeteria food, etc). Watch them until you can't take it anymore. You win if they stop while you're watching. You lose if they catch you creeping. Or in general, actually.
P.S.
Taylor would like you to know that
babies are NOT
dildos.
XOXO,
Gossip Games
